It's impossible given the time and mood of the season to escape it: the inevitable, albeit well-intended and heartfelt greeting of "merry Christmas." Also inevitable is my own response of, "Thank you, and happy holidays to you, too." Sometimes the conversation is over. Other times, it's just begun. Do not get me wrong, I think open dialogue is both useful and vital. However, I wish to clarify a few things purely from my point of view.
- I do not feel a casual wish of "happy holidays" takes away from my joy in celebrating Chanukah or anyone else's joy in celebrating the holidays of their given or chosen faith. If I know you celebrate a certain holiday, I am pleased to greet you accordingly. If you know I celebrate Chanukah, please feel free to greet me accordingly!
- I respect the unique traditions behind the holidays that others may observe and I cherish the unique traditions around the holidays that I observe. There is a colorfully vast realm of diversity painting the canvas of this season!
- Chanukah is NOT Jewish Christmas. Chanukah is it's own unique holiday that happens to fall around the same time as a few other unique holidays, including Christmas, Kwanzaa, winter solstice, the secular new year and more.
- Being that there are so many celebrations in this season and many meanings behind them, wishing someone "happy holidays" is not just a way to be politically correct or culturally sensitive, it is a way to encompass the many occasions for celebration this time of year.
That said, now let's talk about cultural sensitivity:
I do not wish to be insensitive to anyone's feelings, beliefs, or opinions. Know that I speak here only for myself and not for anyone else, particularly not on behalf of the Jewish people as a whole. My journey has landed me in some amazing locations alongside some amazing people who challenge and inspire me. I pray today, and every day, that my journey continue to bring people across my path who will inspire and challenge me in this way! I have had conversations with individuals, groups, and panels who strive to cultivate an interfaith dialogue through the lens of kindness and compassion. I have also been privy to conversations that were not as kind or compassionate. The question that often comes up and rarely gets resolved is this:
"If it bothers you so much to be wished a merry christmas rather than happy Chanukah, why not just wish everyone a happy Chanukah and call it good?"
And here, in a hopefully well-articulated nutshell is my answer:
The Chanukah story is unique. It is not different in that oppression of the Jewish people is at all uncommon, but rather that unlike many other instances of persecution in Biblical times--or even afterward, the Greeks did not primarily seek to eliminate the Jewish people. Rather, they sought to assimilate the Jews. They did not necessarily have an issue with the Torah or with mitzvos, particularly if they were inherently logical or meaningful. They did, however, have a huge problem with the aspect of fulfilling mitzvos that was supra-rational. They could not accept the idea that the Jewish people did such things for the purpose of infusing the world with holiness rather than the purpose of infusing the world with logic. So rather than seeking to kill the Jewish people, they sought to make us just like them. However, for the Jewish people, assimilation is death to the soul. And spiritual death is equivalent to if not worse than physical death. The violent war emerged only after the Jewish people's refusal to assimilate; through the victory and strength of a few, the miracles of Chanukah emerged and are, to this day, remembered and celebrated.
Today, sadly, is not much different from the times of the Greeks. In our extended exile, the Jewish people are frighteningly closer to assimilation than ever. At the same time, however, the threat is no longer the proverbial Greek army--it is an internal threat significantly closer to home, our own selves. For as much as I or others like me wish to be peacekeepers and peacemakers--often to our own detriment--we are by our G-dly nature meant to rise above that much in the way that oil rises above water. While many other faiths proselytize and encourage conversion, Judaism has been and remains insular. Conversion is permissible and welcome in specific circumstance, but it is not outwardly encouraged or sought after.
And so, it is as simple as this: being wished a 'merry Christmas' does not offend me if the greeter does not know I'm Jewish. It's a pleasantry and well intended. Being asked, encouraged, or forcefully told to only express that greeting to others at this time of year does not sit well with me. Additionally, this is not and cannot be one of those reciprocal two way exchanges. Me wishing one and all a happy Chanukah does not solve the issue. This is the very essence of what Chanukah signifies and recalls--an essence which is still frighteningly ablaze in modern times. It may not be logical, it may be supra-rational altogether. That oil-to-water quality is the same unique quality that preserved the Jewish people in the time of the Greeks, and also in the story of Purim, as well as in the story of Pesach... It preserved the Jewish people during the Inquisition and the crusades. It preserved the Jewish people during the Holocaust. It preserved the Jewish people during the wars in Israel. And right now, across the world-- from every menorah-lit window, this quality preserves the Jewish people today.
I wish everyone--regardless of faith, creed, location, or destination--a meaningful season. May we all find the strength and courage to rise above that which is ostensibly easy, natural, or logical for the important purpose of education and advocacy. May we also cultivate the kindness and compassion to infuse this darkness with a little light. And lastly, to my Jewish family and friends, Chanukah Sameach!
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